Advice and Help for Teens

How to Make Friends in High School

Okay, seriously? Like every kid I teen life coach wants to know either

A: How to make friends in high school or

B: How to deal with the B.S. that happens in their friend group.

You are so not the only one.

There are so many layers to this struggle. (I’m actually going to be doing group teen coaching around building confidence and making friends. HMU if you want more info on that.)  A lot of times it’s a confidence issue. There’s also confusion about how you’re supposed to start a conversation. Then there’s the question of—no, really—exactly how am I supposed to make friends?

Short version: you find your ideal friends and you talk to them. Here’s how.

1: Make a list of what you are truly interested in. Not what you’ve always done, but what you want to do.

2: Brainstorm classes, clubs, or places where others interested in the same shit might hang out.

3: Go to those places. Pull out your phone. Pretend to scroll as you observe and eavesdrop.

4: Figure out which people seem like they’re cool, like they’re on your level.

5: Next day, park yourself and your phone near them. Pretend to scroll. Notice what they’re wearing or talking about or some other detail you can comment on.

6: When there’s a quiet moment, talk to them!

Oh wait. That’s not so easy? Yeah, you’re right. Okay, to learn exactly how to talk to them, jump to my post explaining how you can start conversations.

Return to Posts

Get Cyndy’s tips on teens and mental health, plus chapter 1 of her YA novel SEND RUDES!

Get articles sent to your inbox once a month.